


When Pining Works Out

by teamchaosprez



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-23
Updated: 2018-05-23
Packaged: 2019-05-10 10:01:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14734853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teamchaosprez/pseuds/teamchaosprez
Summary: Very loose prompt: "Please don’t hurt me like this because I love you"





	When Pining Works Out

**Author's Note:**

> i love tokomaru more than i love myself

There were certain things that one would expect when admitting to their crush on somebody, and if Komaru was being honest, she thought for a fact that Toko would turn her down in favor of her consistently obsessed over Byakuya Togami - even if they had lived together for two years now and the heir had not once stopped shooting her down. It was the alcohol that was giving her courage, she thought, the two of them having sat down around a garbage fire with a small group of middle aged people that had been grateful for their help dispatching a small group of Monokumas. Komaru may or may not have indulged in a couple of drinks, having never tried it before and wanting it to get over with, but Toko had shaken her head and refused, stating that she needed to make sure the younger girl got back to their apartment in what used to be the upper class area of Towa City.

Her alcohol tolerance was much lower than she originally expected (based on movies and TV, honestly), so after three glasses she was tipsy and leaning against Toko, just staring at the fire with her mouth open a little and her mind numbed. “I’d better get us home,” the writer spoke up before standing, pulling Komaru with her. The younger of the two tried to wiggle out of her grasp, but submitted with a soft grumble as Toko began the struggle of trying to drag her back home.

Her cheeks began to gain a bit of a pink tint when she realized that the girl that she had been unapologetically crushing on for two years was in such close content to her. Toko was her best friend, first and foremost, and she didn’t want to ruin their bond; that was why she hadn’t said anything to her yet. Komaru didn’t know how long she could keep quiet, though, with Toko’s arm around her and her long hair tickling her nose a little bit and the alcohol tempting her to just blurt it out right then and there. She managed to keep quiet, though; she managed to wait. Just screaming it out while the older girl was trying to get her through the ruined city would probably not be the most romantic way to go about things, and if she was ever going to say anything, she at least wanted it to be in the comfort of their apartment.

“Promise me you’ll never do this again,” Toko grumbled as she walked up the stairs; Komaru finally had a bit of her footing back, so she was able to pull away from the older girl and lean on the railing as the two of them walked upstairs. Their apartment was on the third floor, and once they reached the door, all Komaru could really do was shuffle in after Toko opened the door and collapse on the bed with a soft groan. She was already starting to feel the consequences of getting tipsy for the first time in her life, and she simply nodded at the older girl, watching her walk away towards her room.

“Toko, wait,” she spoke up, forcing herself up to her feet before stumbling over to the older girl. Toko turned around quickly, hearing her approach, and when Komaru fell over at the end of her short journey, the writer caught her. She looked like she was about to scold the shorter of the two, but before she could, Komaru straightened up, gripping Toko’s shoulders, and made herself talk. “Okay, I’m probably only brave enough to tell you this while I’m tipsy, so I’m going to! I’m in love with you! I have been since we were fighting the Warriors of Hope! I think you’re the most beautiful, smartest, and most talented girl I’ve ever met, and you probably don’t feel the same, but I want you to know that I like you!”

She had played this scenario out in her head more than a few times, and had figured out that there were two options. The wishful thinking scenario was the one where Toko smiled, told her she felt the same, and kissed her. The more realistic option was being pushed off and told that the writer’s heart belonged only to Byakuya Togami. So it was confusing to Komaru’s alcohol affected brain when neither of those things happened; when Toko didn’t say a word. So she forced herself to look up at the older girl.

Violet eyes had widened and were staring at her. The thin writer’s mouth opened and closed like a fish gasping for water, before finally settling on closed. Tears began to form and streak down Toko’s face, and Komaru couldn’t help but feel confused. Crying wasn’t something she thought would happen. What kind of reaction was crying? Oh, no, it was probably bad, she probably fucked up…

Her thoughts were interrupted, though, by a sudden, single word that the older girl blubbered out - “why.” Komaru didn’t know what to say to that - she didn’t even know what Toko was talking about. All she could think to do was straighten up as well as she could and look at the older girl’s face now - and moments after they were at eye level, Toko was talking again between sloppy tears. “Why are you doing this to me?” she asked in a shrill, high voice, sobs wracking her skinny frame, and Komaru didn’t know what to do. Her partner was not a crier - Komaru didn’t know her for bursting into tears in all but the most serious of circumstances. She was at a complete loss, not knowing what she was supposed to say to soothe the older girl, only gently rubbing her upper arms.  _ Terrified. _

“I - I don’t know what you mean,” she stammered out, heart sinking to the bottom of her stomach. She had no idea whether or not Toko returned her feelings based on that response, but either way, she knew that it wasn’t good. For somebody who talked so much about the boy she wanted to love her back, Toko didn’t seem to know how to handle love confessions… or maybe she was just too emotionally wrecked, too vulnerable, to react properly. Either way, Komaru felt immense guilt for forcing her to feel these emotions. Forcing her to think whatever she was thinking.

“I know you can’t really like me! I know nobody can ever return my feelings!” Toko’s voice was shrill, almost a screech, and Komaru almost stepped back at the sheer volume she was faced with. “Y-You’re just trying to test my loyalty to Master, or you’re going to turn around and abandon me in a few weeks… there’s no way you actually like me. Last time anybody said anything like that to me, they stood me up, and never spoke to me again, and I was brokenhearted for weeks…  _ years _ …”

“What? No, Toko, I was being serious. I really do love you…” Komaru wished she knew what she was supposed to say. She sucked in a deep breath and released through her nose, closing her eyes for just a moment before looking to the older girl with a serious expression. “Listen. You’ve spent so much time with me over the last few years. We’ve worked together so closely for so long, and we’ve been through a lot, haven’t we? Have I ever once lied to you about how I was feeling, about anything? Regardless of how much I tease you or whatever.”

Toko sniffled, unable to meet her eyes, and shook her head. Komaru gently put her hand on the other girl’s cheek, making her look at her. “No, but… I just don’t understand why you’d want to date me.” The writer made eye contact for just a moment, and looked away. “I’m ugly, and I’m mean and rude… I used to be so mean to you. Not to mention I’ve got all those issues with anxiety and trauma, and I’ve been pining over Mas-- Byakuya for so long, and not to mention the whole thing with Syo… god, I don’t know why you want to have anything to do with me regardless with her around…”

“You’re not ugly, and you’re only mean and rude because you think you need to be to protect yourself.” Komaru was reacting without really thinking about it, hoping she was saying the right things. “The anxiety and trauma aren’t your fault at all, and pining over Byakuya… I can’t say much of anything for that, but I figured it was just some weird quirk of yours, yeah?” She smiled, and Toko let out a faint little scoff. “And as for Syo, I like her just as much as I like you. I want to date  _ both _ of you.”

She sniffled, and wrapped her arms around Komaru. The younger of the two was a little surprised for a moment, but held her close, burying her face in her long hair - Toko had gotten much, much better with her personal hygiene as she healed from her mental struggles, and Komaru thought she smelled wonderful, though she supposed that it wasn’t exactly an appropriate time to bring up her slightly creepy thoughts about her best friend’s hair.

“I like you too,” Toko spoke quietly and weakly, though she didn’t pull away, and she didn’t especially want to push her off so that she could look at her face in what was supposed to be a romantic memory in all of her positive fantasies. “I… if you want, I would really like for us to get together, but I… I still don’t really understand why you would want that. And you’re going to have to be patient with me, because… well, honestly, you’re the first person that’s ever cared about me, in any kind of way.” A thought seemed to cross the writer’s mind, and she pushed Komaru slightly in order to grab onto the younger girl’s shoulders. “You need to promise me that if something goes wrong romantically, you won’t just leave me. You won’t abandon me.”

“I won’t!” Komaru almost snapped, startled by the sudden movement as well as the accusations flying from Toko’s mouth. She gently put her own hands on top of the older girl’s. “I know you have issues trusting people, but I care about you too much to hurt you like that. I’m asking you to be with me  _ because _ I care that much about you, I promise.” A heavy sigh left her, eyes closing for just a moment; she was trying her best to handle this, and she hoped that Toko could tell - that it was helping. “Look, Toko, even if something goes wrong in our romantic relationship, I’ll keep being your friend. We’ve been through too much together for us to separate because we didn’t sync as well romantically as platonically.”

Toko gave a little nod, and looked a little more at peace - more at peace than she had looked before, anyway, because the writer always looked like she was in a state of relative anxiety and panic. A moment of silence passed between the two of them, both teenagers just looking at each other, unsure of what they were supposed to say next. Komaru was beginning to think about what she was supposed to say, but before she could get very far, the older of the two had moved forward and pressed their lips together in a very sudden but very wanted kiss.

The writer’s lips were dry and bitten from anxiety, but softer than Komaru had originally expected, but she couldn’t really say that it made the moment any less magical. She had been waiting for this moment for a long enough time that her heart was fifty feet in space, capable of lifting her off the ground and bringing her up to heaven itself.

“Let’s take it one day at a time, okay?” Komaru asked, her voice soft as she pulled away from the kiss and rested her forehead against the older girls. Toko let out a shaky breath, and nodded.

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to comment!


End file.
